Well, once again my confidence has been shaken. Since moving to Wisconsin in November of 2011, we have owned two homes. Our home in Minnesota is for sale but with the weak housing market, it is still ours. We began renting it in June of last year so this allowed me to begin my journey of leaving the workplace. About ten days ago, I received a telephone call informing me that the renter had taken his own life. This news immediately made my thoughts go in the direction of needing to find a job. Of course this was the only solution; we needed more money. I grappled with this for a few days until I regained some clarity of thought and then began to look at other possibilities. My daughter encouraged me not to look for a job; things would work out.
For the past couple days, I have had the classic experience of having two small figures (one of each shoulder) going back and forth with conflicting advice. My responsible classical thinking self tells me I have no choice while my "think outside the box" self informs me there must be other ways to make this work. It tells me you want the summer off and do not want to sit in some office again giving your time and energy to some thing you don't really care about. You want to be available for your family, your home, the outdoors, etc. If you had the knowledge that your life would end soon, where would you want to be?
So this is my life right now; back and forth between conflicting ideas. I truly want to continue this journey.
Thought for today: A man sooner or later discovers that he is the master-gardener of his soul, the
director of his life. ~James Allen
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Seeing the Past More Clearly
Ever since I was a child, there has been a fascination for me with the past. The Amish have always intrigued me, the Little House book series was my favorite and there has been a feeling that I belonged more in the 1880s then the 1980s.
I even had this absurd concept that the world really was black and white at one time or at least there must have been less color. Subconsciously I think I believed that people had a difficult time functioning without modern inventions or conveniences.
With my extra time I have been watching some old movies and televison shows. Through this I have come to realize that my odd beliefs were not true. People lived life in color and grappled with the same human issues of today. They didn't go through daily life bemoaning what hadn't been invented; they just lived. If I look back at my own experience, there wasn't time spent contemplating what could or might be. Certain things such as rural electrification and modern washing machines certainly changed lives considerably. However, I would argue that even with modern conveniences, we still don't have more free time or a larger sense of fulfillment.
So I have been forced to look at the past in a different light and to realize that while some aspects may have been better; other realities were not. Much the same as our world today. There are parts of the world of the 1880s that I would embrace, but at the same time I would not want to return to a time when blacks and women had no rights. I am learning that each era has good and bad elements; perhaps we can choose to keep some of the good and be thankful some of the bad have been eradicated.
Thought for today: “The distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion” Albert Einstein
I even had this absurd concept that the world really was black and white at one time or at least there must have been less color. Subconsciously I think I believed that people had a difficult time functioning without modern inventions or conveniences.
With my extra time I have been watching some old movies and televison shows. Through this I have come to realize that my odd beliefs were not true. People lived life in color and grappled with the same human issues of today. They didn't go through daily life bemoaning what hadn't been invented; they just lived. If I look back at my own experience, there wasn't time spent contemplating what could or might be. Certain things such as rural electrification and modern washing machines certainly changed lives considerably. However, I would argue that even with modern conveniences, we still don't have more free time or a larger sense of fulfillment.
So I have been forced to look at the past in a different light and to realize that while some aspects may have been better; other realities were not. Much the same as our world today. There are parts of the world of the 1880s that I would embrace, but at the same time I would not want to return to a time when blacks and women had no rights. I am learning that each era has good and bad elements; perhaps we can choose to keep some of the good and be thankful some of the bad have been eradicated.
Thought for today: “The distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion” Albert Einstein
Too Much of Everything
Having lived now for almost 54 years, I have a few decades to contemplate. What I have been feeling lately is that at this stage in the history of mankind, there is too much of everything.
I grew up on a farm, went to a country type school, had one television channel and a party line telephone. Now the family farm has been diminished by corporate farms, country schools are no longer, there are hundreds of channels and cell phones rule the world. I am not naive in thinking that things shouldn't and won't change, but I also feel like we don't have to embrace things just because they exist.
Having all those television channels doesn't mean there is any thing worthwhile to watch and are we really more connected as a society just because we can be reached 24/7 via cell phone? I would say we are less connected and due to having too many choices and too many things, our minds are cluttered.
While I regret to admit I am a fan of American Idol, lately I have been wondering do we really need any more "artists". What happened to the time when people were just discovered and not forced. The channels are bogged down with "reality" shows. Are they reality? I highly doubt it. Why not embrace our own reality and make the most of each day rather than sitting around watching other people's lives? Why do we care about the Kardashians or the daily barrage of which star's relationship ended or who got a tattoo?
As a society we must not like our lives much if we are so enamored with the trivial details of others.
I would venture to say we were a happier people when we could walk into the local grocery store with less choices but where we were known and cared for. We were more contented when we watched our one channel rather than flipping through hundreds.
We were more connected when families and friends actually helped each other rather than were "friends" via Facebook. As Jay Leno once said, "when you need helping moving, you will find out just how many Facebook friends you really have."
I don't claim to be a Luddite, but I do believe it may be time to take a step back and reevaluate our priorities before our minds become as cluttered and overflowing as our landfills.
Thought for today: Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity! I say, let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand instead of a million count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumb-nail. ~Henry David Thoreau
I grew up on a farm, went to a country type school, had one television channel and a party line telephone. Now the family farm has been diminished by corporate farms, country schools are no longer, there are hundreds of channels and cell phones rule the world. I am not naive in thinking that things shouldn't and won't change, but I also feel like we don't have to embrace things just because they exist.
Having all those television channels doesn't mean there is any thing worthwhile to watch and are we really more connected as a society just because we can be reached 24/7 via cell phone? I would say we are less connected and due to having too many choices and too many things, our minds are cluttered.
While I regret to admit I am a fan of American Idol, lately I have been wondering do we really need any more "artists". What happened to the time when people were just discovered and not forced. The channels are bogged down with "reality" shows. Are they reality? I highly doubt it. Why not embrace our own reality and make the most of each day rather than sitting around watching other people's lives? Why do we care about the Kardashians or the daily barrage of which star's relationship ended or who got a tattoo?
As a society we must not like our lives much if we are so enamored with the trivial details of others.
I would venture to say we were a happier people when we could walk into the local grocery store with less choices but where we were known and cared for. We were more contented when we watched our one channel rather than flipping through hundreds.
We were more connected when families and friends actually helped each other rather than were "friends" via Facebook. As Jay Leno once said, "when you need helping moving, you will find out just how many Facebook friends you really have."
Thought for today: Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity! I say, let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand instead of a million count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumb-nail. ~Henry David Thoreau
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Living The Dream
Yesterday it finally became clear to me that I am living my dream. It has now been 8 months since leaving the work force after 33 years of working in various offices. So you might wonder why did I just arrive at the realization. Well, I think it is because of the fear of it ending; therefore, I didn't want to fully enjoy it.
We had quite a bit of snow yesterday, and as I watched it come down it became clear to me that I didn't have to go out if I chose not to. That led to my pondering how nice it was to have the choice.
So then I asked myself why I wasn't fully enjoying this time which led me to the conclusion stated above. I further thought about it and told myself that every thing ends at some point, but we still take time to enjoy such things as childhood, family, romances, vacations, even life itself. This dream is so important to me that I don't want it to end. It has given me time to regroup, relax, rest, spend time with my kids and grandchildren, to just be. Now I am looking forward to spring and a summer without having to go to a job. Being at home and caring for the house and my husband is rewarding for me.
Now I am going to attempt to just enjoy every moment of it and not think of the possibility of it ending. If I do have to enter the work force again, I will try to do it with grace and thankfulness for the time I did have.
Thought for today: To live in the present moment is a miracle. The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green Earth in the present moment, to appreciate the peace and beauty that are available now. Thich Nhat Hanh
We had quite a bit of snow yesterday, and as I watched it come down it became clear to me that I didn't have to go out if I chose not to. That led to my pondering how nice it was to have the choice.
So then I asked myself why I wasn't fully enjoying this time which led me to the conclusion stated above. I further thought about it and told myself that every thing ends at some point, but we still take time to enjoy such things as childhood, family, romances, vacations, even life itself. This dream is so important to me that I don't want it to end. It has given me time to regroup, relax, rest, spend time with my kids and grandchildren, to just be. Now I am looking forward to spring and a summer without having to go to a job. Being at home and caring for the house and my husband is rewarding for me.
Now I am going to attempt to just enjoy every moment of it and not think of the possibility of it ending. If I do have to enter the work force again, I will try to do it with grace and thankfulness for the time I did have.
Thought for today: To live in the present moment is a miracle. The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green Earth in the present moment, to appreciate the peace and beauty that are available now. Thich Nhat Hanh
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