The Ordinary

I have two books that address the idea of finding joy in simplicity and embracing the ordinary.  This concept takes many forms such as minimalism, Buddhism, Native American beliefs, the Shakers, etc.  
While I am not Buddhist, Native American or a Shaker, I do find peace in minimalism.  I find that when my space is cluttered, my mind is cluttered.  I do admit that I can take it to an extreme at times, for instance, I keep my e-mail inbox to about 5-10, and I get "nervous" when my DVR is less than 75% free.  

I realize that as a child growing up on a farm in the 1960s, generally my life was one of simplicity and few material belongings.  A couple of my favorite things to do were hanging out in the hay shed taming wild cats and sitting by the very small creek in the field watching the water ripple over the rocks.  We only had one television channel, and the only movie I saw during my childhood was Snow White.

As I grew up and became a wife and mother, it seems I left behind some of those ideals.  Now as I approach old age and seem to be searching for my authentic self, I once again find solace in simplicity and quiet. Maybe that is how the cycle of life works; we eventually come back to ourselves.   I limit my television watching to a about five channels and leave the other 150 alone.  I hang my clothes outside in the summertime and on racks in the basement during the winter.  I find joy in chirping birds, acrobatic squirrels and the miracle of flowers that return every year.  

All goes back to the earth,

and so I do not desire

pride of excess or power,

but the contentments made

by men who have had little:

the fisherman’s silence

receiving the river’s grace,

the gardener’s musing on rows....

~Wendell Berry, "The Want of Peace"

 I remember when my mother passed away and I was going through her jewelry box and dresser drawers, it became apparent to me that she was a simple person.  It was then I realized where my love of simplicity derived, and it touched me deeply.  

Some times being your authentic self isn't always approved by others; society wants you to fit a mold. Every day we are bombarded with extraordinary stories and images of celebrity.  We are made to feel like we don't measure up, and we are just ordinary.  However, I have found that true happiness comes from finding out who you are and being that person.  I believe that the true nirvana to be reached in this life is happiness in whatever form that resonates with you.



Thought for the day:  To find the universal elements enough; to find the air and the water exhilarating; to be refreshed by a morning walk or an evening saunter... to be thrilled by the stars at night; to be elated over a bird’s nest or a wildflower in spring — these are some of the rewards of the simple life. ~John Burroughs

Do You Believe in Fairies?

On a couple of occasions when I have been out of town for a few days, I will return to empty ice cube trays.  My husband has stated that the "ice cube fairy" must have been out of town.  Well, as I pondered this concept, it occurred to me there must be quite a few fairies living in our home.

Here are a few examples:

ice cube fairy

cooking fairy

dishwashing fairy

shopping fairy

cleaning fairy

bill paying fairy

laundry fairy

paperwork fairy


Here's a shout out to the all the fairies of the world and those who live in the shadows but keep the world turning.  Guess I better don my wings and get started on dinner!


Thought for the day:  The fairies went from the world, dear, because men's hearts grew cold.  And only the eyes of children see what is hidden from the old.
Kathleen Foyle

The Art of Illusion

Have you ever thought about how much illusion surrounds us?  Perhaps it comes with aging and wisdom, but recently I have become acutely aware of illusions.  There is an art to illusion but also a large monetary component, and of course, the more technologically advanced we become, the more sophisticated illusion can become.

Here are a few examples of illusions:

President Franklin D. Roosevelt was unable to walk unassisted, but the general population had no idea this was the case.

President John F. Kennedy was in pain most of the time from a war injury and also suffered from Addison's Disease.  The public was not aware of this and in fact, he projected himself as extremely healthy and vigorous.  He also was a great womanizer but yet when we think of he and his family, the picture is that of a beautiful, perfect family.

The majority of photographs portray us as smiling and happy when often we are unhappy and suffering from innumerable issues.  

Television, movies and magazines lead you to believe that there is always a happy ending and that you can be young forever.  Airbrushing and digital technology can transform imperfect beings into perfection which leaves the general population wondering what is wrong with them.

Then there is dating.  Does this really set us up for real life?  How often are we dressed up, smell great and are on our best behavior?  

How many times have we heard stories about abuse, murder, or suicide occurring in families that looked perfect from the outside?

Of course, there have always been magicians and illusionists that make us wonder how do they do these things?

Let's not forget all our "reality shows"  which are set up to appear like real people doing ordinary stuff.  How many of us could act real if the cameras were rolling?



I am not trying to be a pessimist or throw stones at every thing; it's just that my eyes have been opened up which leads me to question what we consider as normal.  Wouldn't it be nice if we could just accept ourselves for who we are and not be sucked into the world of the advertising moguls who want you to believe the illusion and buy the product that will provide the solution?
It seems to me there would be much less unhappiness and low self esteem and much more gratitude and contentment.  Just the thoughts of an aging person.

Thought for the day:  Illusion is the first of all pleasures.  Oscar Wilde

The Acceptance of Aging

This May marked my 55th year in this battle called life.  When I was a teenager,  I couldn't conceive of being thirty.   Now if I see some one has passed away at eighty, I think it was too soon.  Our concepts most definitely change about age.

This summer while wearing shorts, tank tops and going barefoot, I began to notice that my legs and feet were starting to remind me of my dad.  The skin seems to be thinning, and there are the same small white spots he had on the top of his feet.  I am also reminded of my aunts Phyllis and Elna when I see my bunions increasing in size.  The skin on my arms is beginning to look like the ladies from church that played a huge part in my formative years.  Below is a card my niece sent me for my birthday.  Notice the arms but don't ignore the joy!

One somewhat painful experience occurred when I rode my bike to the river to read and cool off.  When I arrived, there were two young men fishing with their music blaring.  I sat down a few feet away from them, and at no point was there any acknowledgement from them that I was even there.  There was no looking over, no saying hello and no attempt to tone down the music.  They also were using foul language almost continuously.  It became clear to me that I was invisible.  If I had been young and beautiful, it would have been a totally different outcome.  So at that moment, it was crystal clear to me that I was no longer what humans consider "young".  It was an eye opening experience for me which caused a few tears.

While spending time with Melody this summer, she was gently and lovingly touching my arms and commented that I had "old lady" skin.  Kids can tell you stuff like that, and it's okay.  It's a good feeling to begin to accept who you are and what stage of life you are in.  We are only young for a short time, and trying to pretend we are young is not a good scenario.  

There is a certain freedom in accepting your age and just being thankful that you are alive, healthy and loved.  It's great being a grandmother and seeing the look of delight spread over the faces of your grandchildren when you arrive for a visit.  It's great watching your children reach goals, be good parents and above all, be kind people.  It's good to look back on all the moments of your life and be able to say that even though you made some mistakes, overall you have been a good person.  

One of the fun things I did for my birthday was bowling with Tahnee, Ethan and Aubree.  A couple weeks ago Melody drew a portrait of me which I think is beautiful and ageless.

Thought for the day:  As we grow older, the beauty steals inward.  Ralph Waldo Emerson

Summer, Where Art Thou?

Yes, been a long time again since I have made the time to sit and get some blogging done.  In the meantime, summer has gone away, and now we are plodding through October on that slippery slope to winter once again.
It was a fun and busy summer so I guess that gives me some kind of excuse for not writing.
Here are a few things that happened:

 Brian and I took a bike ride along the Red Cedar trail and stopped to refresh ourselves in the river.

Spent the weekend at a cabin near Pelican Rapids MN with my family.  The grandkids sure liked that sweet corn!

Aubree spent her first week away from home at our house.  She was here for a week.  We had a good time, and ice cream was abundant!  The ride back home was long and hot, but we made it.  We read Cat in the Hat a few times and watched the cartoon so this is how we greeted Mom and Ethan.

I made a few batches of spaghetti sauce and tomato soup and built a fence.

I got to go grocery shopping with Aria and spend time with her at the water park.  We also celebrated her 2nd birthday and spent time at Lacey and Jonathan's pool.  As you can see in the photo, Ethan was all set to go swimming.

So that sums up the summer of 2014 and now life rushes onward as we approach 2015.  I do wish it would slow down a bit, but chances are that is not going to happen!

Thought for the day:  Summer’s lease hath all too short a date.” ― William Shakespeare

My Melody

With school out for the year, I was blessed with a visit from Melody.  There are special things we do when she visits such as playing Go Fish, hiding the trolls, watching movies, visiting the Dollar Store and going to the library.
Generally, she hides the trolls and asks Brian to find them.  She also helped me set up my fairy garden and hid the fairy for Brian to find.  She had to go home before he got home from work so he had to find the trolls and fairy without her.

We had a wonderful time together.  She can now ride her bike without training wheels so we rode to the park and library.  It's fun to watch her pick out books as she puts much thought into it.  She acquires a stack and then goes through them again before deciding which ones are coming home with us.  She always asks me who my favorite grandchild is.  I love them all so that's a tough one.  I told her that she is special because she was my first.

Our only downfall was when it was time to practice her piano.  It was the last week of lessons for the year, and she was given instructions to practice and not be dramatic about it.  Well, she sat down at the piano with good intentions but soon the drama began.  She wanted me to help, but I didn't do it quite right and then she felt like I was too annoyed.  So she asked me to leave the room.  I heard her play and then suddenly it stopped.  When I went to check on things, she was curled up on the floor crying.  She told me she hated piano and wanted to quit and that she was no good at it.  So we discussed that, and she tried again to no avail. She gave me a note that said "Baba, you need to hate me."   Finally she went upstairs and packed her stuff and planned to go home.  I took her on my lap and told her that some times we have to do things in life we don't want to do.  By this time we were both crying because I realized she was well on her way to finding out life can be cruel.  I wanted to keep her my little grandchild.  We got through it and all was well again.  However, I didn't ask her to practice the next day because I just didn't have it in me.  I will leave that to the parents.


I love having Melody come visit and hope she doesn't grow up so quickly that she doesn't want to come any longer.  Baba loves her so much.

Thought for the day:  A child can ask questions that a wise man cannot answer.  Unknown

In The Throes of Summer

Ah, Summer is here!!  Yes, even though a few weeks ago it seemed as if winter's grip would never let go, we are now in the wonderful arms of summertime.  

The gardens are growing and flowers blooming.  The hummingbirds, orioles and blue jays grace the backyard.  The wondrous smell of newly mown grass and freshly cut alfalfa fill the air.  The brutal side of the season has visited us recently with the loss of trees and electricity.  We still welcome summer and all that comes with it.

We were able to pick strawberries last week and gathered 20 pounds between the two of us.  I froze several bags and made a strawberry pie.  Yummy.

I have become a watcher of the weather in order to decide when to wash my clothes and have hung them out for several weeks now.  I have not used my clothes dryer at all.  Yesterday was the first time the rain surprised me, and my clothes were washed all over again.  I found the perfect basket for holding clothespins, and I have become quite proficient at hanging my clothing.  It makes me think of the ladies in the 1940s and 1950s who had a bit of a contest to see who could get their wash on the line first.

When it gets hot and humid, I like to go down to the river and take a dip.  Last week was the first time I went this year.  Normally I go with Brian, but he has been working long hours and our time together is rare.  So I convinced myself it was alright to go there by myself as long as I stay right by the shore. My self talk also consisted of reminding myself how difficult the long winter was and how much I deserved that trip to the river.  The water level is so high that jumping in by the shore is plenty deep.  So I have ventured there about three times now, and it is the most amazing feeling.  The water is just perfect for cooling your core and helping you get through the heat but not so cold that you can't handle it.  I feel like a new person when I get out.

So I am embracing summer and loving it very much.  I am trying to live in the moment and not think about how quickly it will be gone.

Thought for the day:  If a June night could talk, it would probably boast it invented romance.   Bern Williams

Back From Outer Space

Yes, I am back.  I am not totally sure why it has been so long since my last blog entry.  I could come up with any number of excuses, I suppose.  It is summer finally after a long brutal winter.  My husband has had some major changes in his job schedule.  I turned 55 in May (less energy?)  I was busy planning a family reunion. The truth of the matter is that I just didn't feel inspired to write.  Certainly don't want to feel like blogging is just another thing to do; I want it to be enjoyable.

So today is July 1st, and I finally feel like it is time. Some times we put things off and tell ourselves that tomorrow is another day.  We will see if my inspiration is short lived or if I will be a regular blogger again.

Thought for the day:  How soon not now becomes never.  Martin Luther

Tiny Visitor

About three weeks ago, my daughter took a trip to Guatemala so we had our almost two year old granddaughter, Aria, for a few days.  I picked her up on my way home from Brainerd where I had been taking care of  Aubree and Ethan.  She was a bit unsure about leaving Dada behind, but once we were in the car all was well.  I got her safely to our home, and she spent the next four days herding our dog, Maxine and our cat, Henry.  She called them woof woof and meow meow.  It was important that we all be in the same space.  

Aria enjoyed playing with Baba's toys and potatoes.  It was fun to watch her play with the blocks that my parents bought for my girls when they were young.  She also found their old puzzles and my globe.  

Brian and I found an rocking horse alongside the road a couple years ago that was free.  We decided not to pass it up as the grandchildren might like it.  She was shy about it at first, but once she got the hang of it, she loved it.

I was a bit concerned about making sure she ate enough so I tried to offer what she might like.  Actually I felt like she ate quite well, and I kept it pretty healthy.

She absolutely loved the animals, and I know she loves Baba. She loves Grandpa, too, but is a bit shy with him.  He can be overwhelming.  One night she stood by my side when I was cooking and grabbed my hand.  She said, "See" and pulled me to the computer room where Grandpa was sitting.  Pretty cute.  So overall, it was a successful stay.  There was some difficulty with getting her to sleep so I made an executive decision to sleep with her in the spare bedroom.  My sleep was essential to being able to keep up with her for four days.
She didn't ask for Mama or Dada, but the last day she did find their photo and laid down with it.

I feel blessed to not be working at this time which allows me the time and freedom to spend time with my beautiful grandchildren.  They grow so quickly, and I don't want to miss these precious moments.

Thought for the day:  I love these little people, and it is not a slight thing when they,  who are so fresh from God, love us.  Charles Dickens, The Old Curiosity Shop

Call of the Wild

Our previously wild cat, Henry, has been living in our home now for six months.
About a month ago, I noticed him at the patio door looking out with interest.  Before long, he was standing up and peering out and then started pounding on the door.

So I decided to let him out because I did not want him to feel like a caged animal and be unhappy.  He would go out for a few minutes and then pound on the door to get back in.  As time has gone on, and spring seems to finally have arrived, he has been outside for up to three hours.  He always comes back which makes me happy.  Normally he comes in wet or dragging leaves and pine needles on his thick fur.  One morning I saw him take off and head hurriedly across Hwy 40 which runs in front of our home.  This is a very busy highway so now I only let him out the back hoping he will forget about what lies on the other side.

It seems that even though he is well fed, warm and very much loved, he cannot ignore the call of the wild.  At least he won't be making any little kitties while he is out and about.  

I can't really explain why I love this creature so very much.  It must be a combination of the throwback to my childhood of having tamed a wild cat plus his appearance in my world shortly after losing my sister.  He gave me focus at a time when I needed it.  Today I told him I love him to the moon and back!

Thought for the day:  Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes!  Theophile Gautier

The River of Life

Over the years it has seemed to me that life is much like a river.  During childhood we tend to be in the quiet, lazy part of the river, perhaps floating along on a raft.  During adolescence, the current picks up a bit and then in early adulthood, it feels like we jump in a boat.  That boat takes off quickly, and before you know it, you add things to the watercraft.  It gets heavier and moves even faster.  At times you wish for a break where you could pull over and rest a bit.
Before you know it, you are entrenched in relationships, children, jobs and all that comes along with these things.  It feels like the boat is going faster and faster and no chance comes along to pull over to the shore.  Then maybe in old age, the current slows a bit as we again hit the quiet part of the river.

When I was young, one of my favorite books was A Lantern in Her Hand.  I read it many times.  The main character had dreams as a young girl of marrying a doctor, moving to New York and becoming an opera singer.  In reality, she married a farmer, had several children and did not become a singer.  She often would say, "Please stop time just for a moment", but that never happened.  Time keeps moving on and with it goes our lives.

So I wonder if after we have maneuvered our boat over miles of the river, surviving the rapids along the way (life), do we empty into the wide expanse of the ocean (death) where we may finally have calm waters and an end to the worry of time?  Some thing to think about.

Thought for the day:  Life is the sum of all your choices.  ~Albert Camus

School buses and Rainbows

During spring break my daughter and grandchildren from Brainerd were finally able to come for a visit.  Aubree has been asking to visit Baba's house for a long time.  We started out with dinner in Woodbury to celebrate Tahnee and Olivia's 30th birthday.  Then we made the trek to Wisconsin, and they stayed with us for three nights.
I told Aubree  that if the sun came out she would be see rainbows in the house because I have a crystal hanging in the window as well as leaded glass windows.  The sun did appear, and she was very excited to see rainbows on the walls, floor and even on her arm.  Magical things can happen at Baba's house.

Ethan is into school buses right now, and we have a very busy road in front of our house.  Every truck that went by seemed to be a school bus, but on Monday we did see actual buses.
The weather warmed up so we went outside to attempt to play in the snow.  It was difficult because the snow was so deep, but we managed.  Ethan likes to shovel so he worked on that.  We made a trek to the local park where they used the slide and swings; Tahnee and Aubree made an attempt to slide down the hill but not too successful due to warm temps.

Grandpa Brian got into the scene by making a snowman with the kids and playing a game with Aubree.  

So all in all, I think they had a good time at Baba's house.  When we reached the Minnesota border on their way back, Aubree told her mom to turn around and go back to Baba's house Right Now!

So now whenever I see a school bus, I think of Ethan and of course, whenever those rainbows appear my thoughts turn to Aubree.

Thought for the day:  Most grandmas have a touch of the scallywag. ~Helen Thomson

Barbie at the Mall of America

About a week ago I went to Woodbury to spend a week with Melody, my 8 year old granddaughter.  Her parents were dropped off at the airport to fly to sunny Mexico, and we headed to the Mall of America.  Most people who know me would surmise that malls are not my thing, especially the largest one in the country.  We got parked and both of us made note of which "state" we left the car.  Parking was not easy as I was driving my daughter's car for the first time which is quite a bit larger than my own.  Melody remarked at how crowded it was and why didn't people stay home when the roads were bad.  Good question.

Our first stop was the American Girl Doll store where I resisted the pressure to buy her some thing.  Then we headed to the amusement park where she rode a couple rides before deciding to move on.  The line was too long for the Mine Ride.  A new attraction was Barbie's Dreamhouse so we definitely had to check that out.  I am also not a huge Barbie fan, but when Melody and I are together that is put aside.  We have watched numerous Barbie movies several times.
Let me just say that the Dreamhouse was very PINK and the theme song playing was Everybody Needs a Ken.  So much for feminism.

After touring the kitchen and other rooms, we headed to the area where you could dress up, walk the runway, get makeup done and do Barbie's hair. 

So that was it; we made it through the whole Dreamhouse.  Outside was a Barbie VW Beetle.  My next car?  I think not.

We had some ice cream and for lunch had food court pizza.  The last stop was the Underwater World.  This was my first time seeing that, and I was pretty impressed.  We managed to find the car and get out of the parking lot and made it safely home. 

I am hoping I don't darken the doors of the Mall of America for awhile, but it was great to spend time with Melody, as always.

Thought for the day:  We used to build civilizations, now we build shopping malls.   Bill Bryson